As a father it can be a bit harder to find the resources and inspiration you are looking for when it comes to pregnancy, birth and parenting. In this section I will offer some Dutch resources for fathers that might be interesting for you as you are preparing for parenthood or right in the midst of it.
In 2020 Pepijn Lanen wrote a book, Vad3r, about his experiences as a father. Vad3r is a personal portrait of parenthood that is both incredibly relevant and universally relatable. Pepijn Lanen, a proud father of three, opens up about fatherhood with heartfelt honesty. He describes the overwhelming love he feels when looking into his children’s eyes as a marvel that his brain can hardly comprehend. The book beautifully captures the transformative journey of becoming a parent and the extraordinary nature of the everyday moments shared with his growing family.
As a way to promote the book, Pepijn also started a podcast where het interviews other well-known dads to unravel the mysteries of fatherhood. How do his guests each try to be the coolest and best parent in their own unique way? Recently, Pepijn and his wife Coco welcomed their fourth child, marking the start of the fourth season of V4der! What I can really appreciate in this podcast is that the stories are real with some sharp, real life edges. Listen and join in as these fathers navigate the joys and challenges of parenting in their own way.
Papa moet het doen #
Papa moet het doen is a podcast by Tim Gouw en Maarten v/d Heuvel, two dads who invite you into the everyday life of their households. Each week they discuss some parenting successes and failures and give you a “Tweak of the Week” to make your next day as a dad a bit smoother.
De Thuisblijfvader #
Ever wondered what it’s like for a man to be a full-time caregiver while his wife is the breadwinner? In his book De Thuisblijfvader (2023), Tim Gouw (known from the Papa moet het doen podcast) shares his personal story as a stay at home dad. How does Tim’s environment view his decision? To what extent do his approach and insights differ from those of stay-at-home moms? He explores societal perspectives on his decision and challes stereotypes around pregnancy, parenting, and childcare. Because, as progressive as we think we are as Dutch people, it turns out we’re quite conservative. While eighty percent of young parent couples claim during pregnancy that they want to split everything 50/50, only eleven percent actually manage to do so. Can’t that be different?
Through his experiences, Tim confronts preconceptions and showcases the joys and struggles of parenthood. Emphasizing, above all, that whether you’re a father or a mother, the journey is worth celebrating.
Read more about the book at the website https://dethuisblijfvader.nl/.
Fatherhood course: Aanpakken voor aanstaande vaders #
Embarking on the journey to fatherhood can be both exciting and overwhelming. As a midwife, David Borman, noticed a gap in knowledge and skills among expectant fathers regarding pregnancy and childbirth, leaving many partners feeling uncomfortable, helpless, or unhappy. Where there are many courses designed for women, or for couples, little information on birth and parenting is explicitly tailored to men. That is why in 2009, David decided to create his own course “Aanpakken voor aanstaande vaders“. The course is designed to prepare and support fathers during pregnancy, childbirth, and the postpartum period, providing valuable insights to empower you on this incredible journey. The course is brief but impactful, filled with practical tips and reliable information.
In addition to this course, David has also written two books for fathers: Aanpakken voor aanstaande vaders (click here for more info or buy the book at Bol.com) and Je eerste 1000 vaderdagen (click here for more info or buy the book at Bol.com).
Interview with Pascal Rotteveel #
While going through the process of figuring out pregnancy, birth and postpartum, Pascal Rotteveel found that a lot of parenting books for fathers are patriarchal, stereotypical, and have gimmicky norms. It was not up to his standard, so he decided to create his own pocket guide for fathers. In an easy-to-read format, it’s a cheat-sheet to parenting, covering everything from birthing plans to changing diapers. It’s a practical manual to navigate the entire journey from pregnancy to the postpartum weeks. It is a book for those who believe in a more active, supportive role, challenging outdated gender roles.
The book itself is written in English, but Pascal was guest on the Dutch podcast Mama’en. So if you are interested in getting to know a little bit more about Pascal before buying the book, I definitely recomend listening to episode #32 of the Mama’en podcast.