The guest of the episode of the Unclassified Woman podcast is Keturah Kendrick. Keturah is an English teacher, and she has known that she doesn’t want to be a mother since her early childhood. In the same way that some women are 100% sure that they want to become a mother, she was 100% sure that she doesn’t. She shares her story of being childless by choice in this podcast episode.

Listen to this episode on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or the podcast app of your choice.

Judged for being childless #

At first, Keturah says she doesn’t feel judged by people around her for not having children. But she then realizes that, actually, she does. Instead of trusting what she says, people will often tell her, “Wait until you find the right man” or “Have a baby and you will see that you will love him/her.” But to her, especially the last notion seems like quite a risky approach to having children.

Regretting motherhood #

Keturah points out that there is a growing number of women who actually regret becoming a mother. Her approach is that motherhood should be considered a lifestyle choice instead of a given, something that everybody does.

Trust your own voice #

Host Michelle and Keturah discuss how, in many situations, women in society are often taught what to do. They are taught not to trust their own voice but instead listen to the voice of other people, especially when it comes to becoming a mother. In our modern society, “adult” has become a synonym for “parent,” and “woman” is often considered to mean “mother.”

Accomplishment #

Motherhood is often seen as one of the biggest accomplishments someone can have in life. But Keturah feels that by being childless, she has actually accomplished much more than if she had been a mother.

Stay on the fence #

Keturah’s advice for other women who are ambivalent about having children or know that they do not want to is to ignore any voice but their own and to trust their own intuition. Especially since parenthood is a task that is mostly done by women around the world. True equity is not present yet. So if you are not sure whether you want to do it, you don’t have to pick up this big responsibility. This is why she believes it is crucial to think it through and not let yourself be influenced by others. Stay on the fence until you have decided.

Book #

Are you looking for more inspiration on making your own decisions about what it means to be a woman? Read Keturah’s book: No Thanks: Black, Female, and Living in the Martyr-Free.

DISCLAIMER: This information is not medical advice. See womenswise.com/disclaimer for more information.

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